The Best and Worst Senior Project Judges

So as the dreaded Senior Project approaches us, myself and many of my classmates have been wondering what teachers will be judging our projects. However, instead of determining what teachers, faculty, and community members will be on my board, I thought of the best and worst possible Senior Project judges.

Best
William Shatner: The guy is always smiling. For instance in Miss Congeniality (go ahead secretly judge me for seeing Gracie Lou Freebush in an evening gown) during the last scene, the stage is exploding and Shatner is just standing on the stage half-singing "Ms. United States" smiling while set debris flys by his head.

The Cookie Monster: The dude can't talk, and just seeing him munch on cookies while you present your year's worth of work would just be entertaining.

Derek Zoolander: You know that during the question section he'd ask the most ridiculous(ly good looking) question about how the size of your product has to be at least...three times the size of what it actually is, and because of how stupid the question was, he'd make you look good.

Anyone in the Full House cast: Whether it's DJ, Uncle Joey, Danny, or Comet, you know that these characters always make sure things turn out alright in the end. I think as a judge, one of the Full House characters would make sure to pass me then give me a hug at the end of the presentation.

Your grandmother: Come on, what grandmother would fail their grandson or granddaughter? She'd probably bake you an apple pie and fill it with a $20 bill after she gave you a perfect score.

Worst
Homestar Runner: I don't know if any of you reading have experienced Homestar, but he is as annoying as five 8 year olds with ADHD who ALWAYS have to go to the bathroom. (check out homestar at www.homestarrunner.com)

Brian Williams orBarbara Walters: Arguably the top two journalists of their era, these two would know how to ask a follow-up question that you would have no idea how to answer. Plus their voices would just get on your nerves.

Interrupting Cow: First of all cows cant talk so then if they were on your panelMOOOOOOOOOOOOthey would be extremely distracting while presentingMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Simon Cowell: Even if you're not singing, Cowell would find a way to shut you up because it's a "singing competition, not a beauty contest."

A rash: Nothing is more irritating than an itchy rash that wont go away. A rash always gets in the way of everything and would completely disrupt the flow of your senior project presentations.


...That is all. Hope you enjoyed. Good luck to all seniors who present tomorrow.

Didn't Discrimination End 50 Years Ago?

Okay, sure the title is a little forward, and maybe a little aggressive too. But it got your attention. However, fifty years ago African Americans were discriminated against by the "Whites" in the Jim Crow South. You don't need to be a history teacher to know the devastating things that happened to minority groups like the African Americans back then. But civil rights activists like Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and Malcolm-X advocated viciously for their freedom by helping pass the Civil Rights Act of 1964 that banned the discrimination in public places, provided for the integration of schools and other public facilities. This act was primarily geared towards protecting the rights of millions of African Americans, however all minority racial groups benefited from the Act.

However nowadays, it's no longer the racial groups being discriminated against.

Everyday, teenagers and adolescents are thought of as inferiors. Parents, or elders everywhere think that teenagers are always immature, rude, and obnoxious especially when teenagers are driving. Parents will automatically think that the teenager is an awful or incapable driver because of our age. Here is some "lingo" that parents say when referring to any teenaged driver...

Punk: (n) a teenaged male driver who listens to "what they call" music loudly, drive fifteen minutes over the speed limit, and holds the steering wheel with one hand, while still maintaining the "tough-guy" look while they drive.

Bimbo: (n) a teenaged female driver who wears large sunglasses that make her look like a bug, sings the lyrics to her "favv" song of the week while going through the crowded intersection without using her turning signal, and having obnoxious bumper stickers that are distracting for other drivers.

Also, parents think that teenagers in cars make the world an awful place. Every time I drive by someone who is doing yardwork, getting their mail, or walking their dog I waive and give them a smile because I want to prove that us teenagers aren't incoherent individuals.

However, I get the opposite reaction once I waive. The elder I waived to instantly gets that grimace on their face. Their face scrunches up in an angry fashion and they take both their hands and "raise the roof in the opposite direction." Instead of pumping both their hands to the sky, like the famous instant party-starter that we know and love, they pump both their hands to the ground indicating for me to slow down.

So teenagers who read this, don't worry what these adults think of you. Keep listening to your average pop music with the windows down. Let the world know you listen to Ke$ha, embrace it. But don't let it get out of hand. We should get the respect we deserve by earning it. Just be thankful we don't drive like this...